This is the real Chapter 39 - if you want to read the April Fool's Day version, it's in the Shorts section now!
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Katherine
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I know when it happens. I'm already on my knees, hands covering my face. I don't want anybody to see, which is silly. I'm still alone, still sneaking around. Still trying not to let 'Sy find me. And for a moment, I just stay there, rock back and forth, and let the sorrow press in. It's going to come whether I try to stop it or not, and it'll pass easier if I just accept it.
I tried so hard to extend Elete's life. 'Sy and I both did. Considering that, it's especially cruel how he went. I can feel it all out, sense 'Sy's reasons as if I was there at the time. And, in a sense, I was. He couldn't Judge someone without me.
I just... I wish I would have been there. Why didn't Elete let me be there? He was a Time Lord, he could have--
That's what breaks me. The sobs take over for a little while, everything is white and grey and snowy. When I come back to myself, arms are wrapped around me. Big, strong arms.
'Sy's crying too. I pat his head. My hand's still so small. I wonder, for a moment, if I could have stopped all of this if I had been fully recovered at the time. But it's nonsense to think that way.
"There was no time," he says. "There's still no time, Katherine. I'm so sorry."
"It's not you that has to apologize for any of that. Just stay here for a bit. Just for a little bit. Let us have this time."
Just a few minutes of quiet. Just a little moment of peace.
"Are you ready?" I really do think this hit him harder than it hit me. But then, 'Sy holds on to things. He's always so betrayed when they don't last. I'm glad I'm here for him now.
"Just a little bit longer." It's his turn to say it. He hugs me tight, and we stay like that for a moment. "Katherine, please don't leave me."
I stroke his hair. "We need to go. You must feel it, too. If we don't move fast... it'll only get worse."
"What will?" Maybe he doesn't feel it. But then, I'm the Poet, not 'Sy.
"Everything. Come on. We've got to rush." I can't say I know exactly what's going on. Without Elete, it feels like everything's falling to chance now. I wonder just how much the Poets have relied on him for their craft - how much I might have myself. Still... I can fix on someone now, and that's enough. I take 'Sy and I there.
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Elesse
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I feel terribly queasy. It's as if I'd never gotten my sea legs and was lost in a rough storm. The whole world feels as if it's pitching and yawing. I can't handle this. I can't handle this at all. I'm not built for it. It's not my place.
I don't even know what it is that I'm going on about. The room is lurching, and bad memories surface. Spiders... shadows... the webs and the things skittering across my skin... the long nights where time wouldn't pass at all...
I hit the floor. You'd think it would make me feel more still, being on the ground - but the ground is moving even now. I cry out. I flail for someone's hand. I keep telling myself that I'm not on the deck of a ship, but my voice isn't getting through to myself very well. I'm howling. How much did I howl for help when I was kept a prisoner in the dark? Is this going to last forever again? Jules isn't here to rescue me this time.
"Ales! Ye daft good-fer-nuthin' salted slug of a drunken landlubber! Get yer ass up!"
It's gotten to the point that I've started hallucinating.
A sharp pain in my ribs is my first indicator that perhaps some of this situation is happening in reality. I try to look up, and manage to turn my head the right way. "...Jules?"
"Captain Jules, you great big scurvy lug." He pauses for a moment. "Aye, and we grab a couple o' ships from the Radian harbor and it'll be Admiral." I can hear the gears turning in Jules's head now. Well, maybe just the one gear. "Come on up!" A hand reaches under my arm and tugs with surprising strength for a man as short as our Captain. Jules is always full of surprises, though. For instance, getting out of his cell at all, and into mine. Still, I can't gain my feet - can't even get to my knees. "Ales, what on the skin of the world is wrong with ye?"
I try to reply, but it comes out garbled. I almost lose it, then manage to climb back up into semi-consciousness. "Something's wrong," I say. It's like I'm a buoy that's lost its anchor to the sea floor, adrift on the waves with nothing to keep me in my proper place. "Help." It's all I manage to get out before I pass out.
I don't like staying awake while I sleep. Normally people would call that dreaming, but this isn't dreaming, and I'm not normal people. I'm some man that Jules dragged out of a spider's nest. I shouldn't even be alive. But I still am. I can see the ocean from here... it's as if I'm lying on top of it. It certainly explains the rocking motion from earlier. But the ocean is too dark, the waves almost opaque. Also, I can haul myself up to stand on top of them. My long years of experience on the open sea inform me that is not how normal waves are built.
Live. I recognize that voice. The man I met earlier. The man who has my face. Eleth-travente. Isn't he a King in this strange country we've landed in? I turn, and he's standing in the sea, ankle-deep. He smiles at me.
I don't smile in return, but I do nod my head.
I really should have moved on by now. He lets out a heavy sigh. He looks so tired. It happens when you're dead. Suddenly, you want to catch up on all the naps you missed. He reaches out and pushes my chest, frowning. You don't belong here, Elessandre.
I frown. But where am I?
All things return to the sea, Elessandre. But not you, not yet. You need to climb back up. It will be hard, but once you make it, you won't have to come back here. He smiles weakly. I can tell these things, you know. My one last prediction, you could say. He sounds so sad.
I extend my hand. He shakes it.
Farewell, then. I nod to him and try to reach for consciousness. It's shining up above me, like a sun in the nighttime. I stretch, I pull...
Awareness hits me like a slap in the face.
"Aye, hit 'im again! He likes it rough!"
The world isn't lurching anymore. It's wobbling a teeny bit, but not even as much as the Kraken's deck on a calm day. I don't feel as sick now. My vision is blurry, but I blink a few times and manage to get some focus. I look up into the Judge's face.
I think that squeal came from me.
"Hey, you don't hurt 'im, now! He's been hurt enough!" Jules sounds upset. I wonder what's got him so riled up? "What're yeh savages doin' teh my crew?"
A cool hand strokes my cheek, then touches the side of my head. It's much smaller than the Judge's. I see that the baby that I found below the Kraken's decks has followed me yet again - only she's definitely not a baby any more. Her green eyes look into mine - I see flecks of blue, flecks of gold in them, and wonder just how strange this child is. She certainly can put a man under scrutiny. I start to squirm. The Judge holds me still.
When did they show up? Jules's rescue certainly was a bust - at least they didn't kill him, though. I wasn't even on guard to keep him alive with my quill this time, so hat's off to him. I close my eyes as a wave of dizziness hits. That black sea wants to pull me under... the Sea where we all die, was it? I've lived to tell a tale about it... I can't die now.
The girl curses. I open my eyes, startled. That certainly wasn't a phrase appropriate for someone her age. Even Sam schools his language better. She glares down at me. "At least help me a little!"
I blink. "What are you trying to do?" She sighs in exasperation - she looks near tears.
Wait, the other me... Elethe-travente. He was in that sea... he didn't come back up with me. He was dying... no, he was already dead. That twists in me like a stiletto in the gut. He certainly seemed well-loved... and here I am, staring up at her, the spitting image of the dead man. "I'm sorry. I really don't know what to do. I really am sorry."
She bites her lip and nods, tears falling from her face. "I know. It's okay."
"Elete said that Elesse wasn't the next Poet King, Katherine." The Judge's voice is very sad. Oh dear. I must be like so much salt in the wounds to them.
"He's enough." She closes her eyes, her brow creasing. "He'll be enough. We just have to focus." The Judge gives no objection in reply.
"Ales? You okay? Don't let 'em hurt you, Ales!"
I try to answer Jules, but the words are taken clean out of my mouth. Instead, I see through the eyes of a young boy in a library... a girl recovering on her Uncle's couch... a pair of brothers who are trying to speak to each other without making a sound... so many people, more and more of them. It's like I'm brushing up against them all, touching each of them so briefly... and then I'm back.
And I feel... clear. Still a tiny bit wobbly, but I'm floating on that sea now, definitely floating. No more sinking. The mental touch of so many people actually serves to bolster me more - alone, it was almost impossible to endure whatever's started to happen to me.
Katherine smiles. "He'll work, for now. We needed a hub. Until we find our new Poet King... we all need someone to connect through. He's... close enough to what Elete--" she chokes off for a moment. "To what Elete was." She wipes away tears. "We can't go forward without a hub, 'Sy."
--Lyric? How could he get out of his room, Gerude? It's not as if he's Lute. Well no, I don't see him in here, but he really is built very small and--
--Camden, my brother, please, I really shouldn't talk to anyone right now, and I don't want to be a bother at such a crucial time--
--seen Jhe h'Logos? My Shenanigan's stuck in the Palace again and I don't know how it keeps getting past the wards--
I idly listen to the conversation, but it's hard to pay much attention - there are so many voices in my mind, so many thoughts that aren't mine. It's really a lovely sensation, ignoring the fact that I can't think myself because of it. The voices and feelings merge so well with that music that I always hear in my head, every moment, every second. It's really more of a symphony now. I'm quite glad I got an opportunity to hear it. It's also quite nice that I can just sit here and look pretty, because right now I can't do much of anything else.
--Hello? I'm stuck in a cell down here, in the Armed Hall? In Jhe o'Audiva Rocale's cell, to be precise. I really don't mind staying in here, it's nice and quiet, but someone really should know that he's gone--
Listening to the voices converse is so very interesting. Some of them sound as if they're from long ago, and some of them seem as if they're from somewhere very far ahead of me - the clear ones sound nearby, though. I wonder what could be causing that? What's that burning sensation? Oh, that's the Judge's glare. Or is it merely scrutiny? It's so very difficult to tell from my vantage on the floor.
"Will he be safe?" The Judge looks at Katherine. The girl's expression shows some surprise--
--oh Katherine I know Katherine do you know Katherine Katherine's such a nice girl but she's with the Judge all the time and he can be so scary and--
--and then nods. "What killed Elete can't kill Elesse."
The Judge's face is a kind of patience that is waiting for an explanation.
She looks away. "We know Ed'huar-- Edward did it. We know that." She takes in a deep breath, then draws herself up. "He could try to reach through the new hub to Elesse, but he won't know to even look. He's too disconnected from the Poets as a whole, and has been walled off from them for too long. He knows Jhe h'Logos is dead, and that's enough for him and enough for his master. Edward won't press because doesn't want to think about anything else that has to do with Jhe h'Logos right now." Her words ring strangely... in harmony with the music in my head. It's really very pleasant.
The Judge nods after thinking that over. "That sounds... plausible. And you know it because of Poetry?"
Katherine juts her chin up. "Yes."
The Judge closes his eyes for a moment. "Appropriate." He rises. "We need to secure this cell. Keep the Captain in it - he'll make a suitable guard." He snorts. "He was certainly competent enough to take out the Gahalespbar-archo." There's a certain rancor to his tone with that last sentence.
--Oh it really was so dreadful in Lyiannethe, even the trees were trying to kill us all, and the spiders--
A shiver runs down my spine. Spiders?
"That mangy ponce? 'E was more of a candied arse than Ales!" Jules's voice rings out above the chorus between my ears, breaking me from the rising panic.
"Hey," I say in faint protest. Sometimes, with Jules, I don't even bother that much. I'm just glad to know he's nearby - though restrained, it seems, in the corner of the cell. That won't hold for long - Jules can spit on a lock and it's as good as picked.
The Judge raises his eyebrow at my Captain. "Stay in here and attempt some sort of good behavior until we come back for you, and your men will be pardoned. Possibly you as well. Keep an eye on your friend. Something has a grudge against him."
Me? Something has a grudge against me?
"Something you're familiar with, I've no doubt." The Judge's scrutiny is hard to bear up under - Jules manages without showing an effort.
"Aye." He gives the Judge a nod. "I'll have my ship back, then?"
The Judge lets out a painful sigh. "I'm afraid that's the decision of the person you knocked out in your cell."
"Ah! Well then, half me work's already done!"
The Judge taps two fingers to his brow, as if in contemplation - I can't discern of what, though.
--careful, please, Jhe Haari'se! They don't know you yet--
The Judge settles himself, then looks at Jules one last time. "Don't run off."
Jules raises an eyebrow. "I make nary a promise I cannot keep."
"That wasn't a request for a promise, it was a threat." The Judge turns to Katherine. "We've more work to do, of course."
The girl nods, then takes one last look at me. "Be safe, okay?" She smooths back my hair, then kisses my forehead.
I blink in surprise. Then, they're gone.
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