* * *
Elete
* * *
I feel sick, and it really is bizarre. Why am I so ill all of a sudden? I was feeling so good just now, so healthy. Now I feel heavy, and sore, and like I shouldn't walk too far unaided.
Wait, isn't that my normal... ah, I see. I was asleep. That's why I felt so good. Until I woke up, of course.
I'm not very used to sleep. It gets in the way of getting things done, so I try to do it very little.
Let's see now... what was I to do right now? I did see it clearly... ah, yes. Make my way to 'Sy. It's about time for that.
Time to meet my twin brother, if I can call him that.
* * *
"This is absurd," says 'Sy, his arms crossed over his chest, his scowl hawklike. It's so like him, really classic 'Sy. I cherish it for a moment.
"Yes, well... grant a dying man his wish?" I should feel bad, really I should, especially the way his face crumples when I say it so cheerful like that. But... well, I know what works with him, and like everyone else in power, I know how to manipulate.
It'll really turn out alright, though. I know it.
"I should lock you up in here too," he growls under his breath as he walks with me to the cell. "Keep you from getting yourself in trouble." And, he thinks, from getting myself killed - but that remain unspoken.
Poor 'Sy. I feel worst for him. Elam... Elam will cope. He'll do fine. I know that - my successor even made sure to tell me so, in case I would fret too much for him. And Elam is really a darling boy, and I really should say goodbye to him. But there won't be time. And he will be fine.
This man, though, whom I've never met... I must see before I leave. 'Sy opens the door to the cell, and I enter.
The man looks up. Black hair, very long - and he has a touch of youth to him that I haven't managed to cultivate quite as well. Almost as if he were younger than me... but then, who knows where he's travelled, and what timelines he's managed to jump between along the way? I shouldn't expect less than that of him, considering. I reach my hand forward, and he gingerly takes it. He's at a loss for words, which likely doesn't occur often for him.
I make a short bow. He responds with his own bow, which has quite a bit more flourish. I chuckle. "You're just as I imagined."
He only looks at me with those bewildered blue eyes -- my eyes, to be frank. "Who are you?" He looks up at 'Sy. "Where did you get him from? Is this some weird custom? A test?"
I smile. He's so young. 'Sy growls something back at the man - I don't really pay attention to it. "I am pleased to meet you," I say. "I am Elete-travente." I incline my head.
He blinks, then composes himself. "Elessandre."
Ah, a lie of a name. But close! Very close. "You've been a bit of an enigma your entire life, but that's okay." I pat him on the forearm. "You do have a purpose here. Be kind to 'Sy, he's really a pushover once you get to know him." I sigh. "You write, do you not?"
"Of course!" He cocks his head. "Really, who are--"
"Could I see something of yours? Just to sate myself." I try not to be too impolite about the interruption, but I don't have much time. I, of all, would know that.
"We confiscated his writings, as he seemed so hellbent on killing us all with them." 'Sy sounds absolutely furious. The poor dear, this is getting to him. I can't imagine what having two of me in front of him must be doing to his nerves - one's often more than he can put up with! "...Here," he says, handing me a sheaf of parchment papers that I imagine he pulled out of some pocketspace or another.
I take the papers. I read. I try not to let my grin betray itself, but it outs me just as soon as I start in. I try to disguise the chuckles as coughs. Really, I shouldn't find it so hilarious, what he did to 'Sy and his Armed on the ship...
...No, I really do think I should.
I smile at Elesse once again. "It's very charming to read work like that again. I haven't seen the like of it since my younger days." 'Sy scoffs. I ignore it. "I must congratulate you on your fine work. I do think it will take you very far. Mind the Judge, and heed the Advocate. Good advice for anyone living, I say." I nod to him again. I turn to 'Sy and hand him the papers, which he tucks away before they can make any more trouble for him. "Could you please escort me to my quarters?"
My handsome young doppleganger raises a finger as if to ask one more time what's going on, but then he gives up.
'Sy regards me with a kind of scrutiny that's difficult to bear up under, but I manage. "Yes," he says. "I suppose you're not feeling well anymore."
I chuckle. "That's never anything to stop me. It's time for me to take a rest, though, and you do have a bit of time to spare for me, now that you've occupied your Chetharian visitor."
He looks a little surprised that I know that, but not a lot. We leave the cell. As soon as we're out of Elesse's range of sight, I begin to lean against him. It's easier this way. I feel so tired, and well...
He wraps his arm around me, giving my shoulder a squeeze.
I should have made more time for him. It's the least I could have done. But I worry about the whole world, and about what he'll do when I'm gone, and so I worked to ensure it would all be easier for everyone, and well...
Maybe it's best this way.
* * *
Edward
* * *
I can't see in here. I wish I couldn't hear, either, or sense anything at all. But no, it's just the blindness.
I'm going to throw up. I keep thinking I will - and I'm sure it'll happen this time, but then it turns out like all the other times. A wave of... I can't rightly call it numbness, its more like not being there... like oblivion. Yes, a wave of oblivion hits me, and then I feel fine again. Except I don't feel fine at all. I feel like I want to kill myself. Wouldn't it be wonderful to end all of this?
You'll adjust, pet. My Herald.
I heard him again. My King. Nul. I heard him again, and that's what drives me closer to true madness more than anything else. He's not really speaking, you see. No one speaks this deep inside Nul's domain. No one dares.
I think I can sense his thoughts. We're that closely connected now. That close. And well... does that mean he can sense mine? He could tell how uneasy I was.
He called me a pet. I shudder.
How long have I been in here? Is there any time in here? I can't see. It's the blindness that gets to me more than anything else - I could deal with deafness, surely. The blindness gets to me because I have a sneaking suspicion that I'd prefer it to whatever I could see, in here. That it's a gift to me, from my King, because he likes his pet so much.
I feel as if I'll throw up again, and then the familiar oblivion washes over me. I'm beginning to expect it. After long enough, I'm sure I'll start longing for it.
You're more entertaining than Cade was, Ed'huar-tsche'lina. I think I shall like you better. You look properly trained. Cade was too much of a mongrel for that. Do you know any tricks?
I almost piss myself.
A joke, pet. Merely a joke. I am in a good mood, despite the recent setbacks. You should feel joy. You are the cause of my good mood.
I do, in fact, feel a reduction in my terror. Is that joy in here? Perhaps.
We have work to do, now that I have you. Work that Cade was never good for, and Ebre-schtullin'eh wasn't ready for just yet. But now I have you, and the latter has been worn down enough that it should be possible. Tell me, pet, do you have family?
None that would keep me after this. None that would want me now, I'm sure of it.
Oh, don't bother lying for me. I can tell the truth in you, you know. I can dig out the lies inside that mind of yours, even hone them into fine jewels. It's quite entertaining... would you like me to dig for them now?
Please. Please no.
Don't plead with me. I am not one to be plead with. But as I do cherish you, pet, and you have made me so happy, I will not punish you for the transgression. Apologize.
I am sorry for my impudence.
Very well. Your family matters not to me - not for now, at any rate. Later, they will, but that is later, and now is time to move on something imminent. Families always have strong connections between each other, do they not?
Often they do.
We will exploit that, my Ed'huar-tsche'lina.
And as he tells me to come with him, we are already moving - no, we are already there. It's not the throne room we are in anymore - some other chamber in Nul's palace, if you could call this a palace... if you could call it anything at all. It reminds me of Lady Thelea's laboratories.
My other pet had to learn the craft from someone, did she not? I can see my King now. I can see where he is, at any rate - my eyes are blind when they run across the shape of him. There is a hint of darkness, of space warping... and then nothing. I wonder if it has anything to do with the blindness I felt in that other place... where I was so terribly close to him. Where it seemed that all there was in the world was Nul and myself, and soon it would be only Nul.
There is an altar. Simple, glass. It rises up from the floor. Jhe o'Audiva Rocale's body is laid out on it. He looks dead, but I know somehow that he isn't, even though he isn't breathing. Some knowledge that's been given to me with my new position tells me that Ebrellin-i simply ceases to breathe when he is this close to Nul. It is not true obedience because it has been trained into him, and so he shall not be commended for it.
How terrible.
Nul gestures for me to heel beside him, and I do. There's no decision, no deliberation - I simply do it. Perhaps that's a mercy in itself. Not being able to fight means not having to struggle... means no fear of whether I'd lose. For I'm truly lost here. None will take me back now, no matter how much my King may say that's a lie.
Nul reaches his cold hand behind my head. I feel something that might be a gauntlet, might be claws, might be fingers curl into my hair and guide me to look down. He pushes and then I'm not above Ebrellin-i--
Ebre-schtullin'eh. Call him by his proper name here, or call him nothing at all. None deserve to be addressed by any other name than I bestow upon them.
I'm in Ebre-schtullin'eh's mind. I almost reel from how much he's cringing right now. Every part of his being cowers away from the world, from me, from my King. He's so afraid that his fear is more palpable than his thoughts.
There's very little thought left in here, though. Only a concept, an idea. The only thing he has left, that Nul has managed to not pry away from him: protect.
Protect what? Himself? He's done a poor job of it so far, I must say.
He protects his family, or at least the family he still claims. He's quite good at it. I've not been able to reach them directly through him - only been able to use him as my puppet, at times. Even then, most attempts met with failure. He is clever, and knows many devious ways to fight. A poor servant, who I have finally manipulated into a position from which I can make use of him.
I reach forward. I don't mean to - it just happens. There's not even an order for me to act - I simply do as my King bids. I reach forward and prod at that part of Ebre-schtullin'eh's mind that wraps so fiercely around his concept of family. I squeeze.
Ebre-schtullin'eh screams. I hear it all around me, as if the very structure I'm inside of now is built from sound. But then, it's built from emotion and thought, isn't it?
He pleads. He pleads far more than I think it wise to dare - if it can be wise to plead with my King at all.
But it is, apparently, very common for him to plead. He does it often - and he runs often, and he tries to get his way often, and he is a brat. And while it is terrible, what is being done to him--
--by myself, even--
--I do realize why my King hates him. Ebre-schtullin'eh uses his mouth too much, and his Will even more. One of these things my King has sought to break.
But now there's less need for that - now that I have you, Ed'huar-tsche'lina. You are my pet, my servant, my Herald. You are better than Cade was - because you are a Poet. A trusted, powerful Poet, second to Elete-travente himself. You have the reach that compensates for Ebre-schtullin'eh's gall.
You can kill his family, then.
I can't remember the last few moments. I know they passed. I know time passed, quite a bit of it in fact. There's the lingering impression of what might have been a punishment, but... no memory.
My King hit me with a flail, lashed me with oblivion. I apparently raised an objection. Punishment is swift for such gall.
But, my family!
You need not worry about your family. Nul tsks in a way that makes it seem as if reality itself had clicked on and off. He has sealed both daughters from me in a way that would break my connection to him if I tried to pry at his grasp. He doesn't consider his Mother true family - and so your dear Thele'nuthelli-na is safe. I'd not kill her now, and certainly I don't need Ebre-schtullin'eh to reach through to do it. My touch is upon all of my pets - I could do so directly.
No, Ed'huar-tsche'lina - there is one other. See how Ebre-schtullin'eh cradles that part of himself that isn't himself, curls himself around it, protects it with all of the self that he has left? I cannot reach it and destroy it, even now.
But you, dear pet, my Herald, you have a connection to Elete-travente yourself. You can reach through to what Ebre-schtullin'eh protects. And you can bridge the connection from it to Elete-travente.
And you can kill him.
My panic is so palpable that I remember a bit of it before oblivion strikes me again. There is a longer moment this time. I must have objected very strongly. A stupid mistake, but-- my King!
I am your King. You may have none other than me. And now you will do as bade.
I try to fight, I really do. Well, I don't, but I try to remember what it was like to fight against something. I can't, now. I can only do as bade, wishing that oblivion upon myself as I do it. I don't want to remember this. I don't want to be here.
But you did want this, Ed'huar-tsche'lina, my pet.
No!
To surpass him, to supplant him, to replace him. You can't live up to his legend until he becomes one, can you? So cherish this as my gift to you. Take his life, and then from there... who knows what I might give you?
I can't hear my scream. I must have suppressed it - or perhaps I didn't, and I simply can't remember it. Perhaps the memory of it has been taken. You have to believe me, though - it was there.
I don't want to kill him.
A lie for me? How kind. I do so love collecting my gems...
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