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Luciprochoros
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My Poet King has, yet again, overextended himself. This is just something Elete does because he doesn't like to think of his limits. Everything else is just an extraneous factor.
The thing is, if I keep thinking that at the front of my mind, he won't throw up his guard. It's what he wants me to think. He's easy to get the drop on in that way. A lot easier than he thinks, even though we have to do this almost every time he gets sick. You'd think he'd catch me at this by now.
Even more testament to the fact that he's much sicker than he wants us to know.
"Were you alright, watching the Trial?" Talking's a great distraction for him, once I can get him to stop clamming up.
"...Both were unfortunate, if not earned. Is the boy taking it well, I wonder? He looked fine, but as I've heard told, he's quite the actor."
I manage to drop my senses into that space behind his eyes while I answer. "Lyric's fortitude is admirable. He held up while being groomed as your brother's pawn. He's got quite a mind on him, though he tries to hide that. I imagine things would be different now if I'd thought to put that mind to use before he ran away with it."
Elete snorts. "Hindsight is always so clear. Why not make use of that and turn it into foresight?" Ah, he's got ideas brewing in his mind. That makes it much easier to pick around in there.
He's so dizzy that I'm surprised he's able to think at all. If he'd tried to stay sitting up like he wanted, he'd probably be on the floor by now. There's a dull pain all through his head. He'd call it a particularly bad migraine, of course, and try to work through it if not for the vertigo. Hells, if he'd managed to get to his quarters instead of shoring up in mine, he'd probably be laid out in bed, dictating to Stevane while she took notes. ...Well, maybe a different Poet than Stevane. She's got the same mind as I do when it comes to Elete's illnesses.
"...You sound as if you have a plan for my nephew. Care to inform me of the details?"
Elete grins, and I can't help but welcome that spark of youthful excitement in his eyes. "I've heard a rumor or two that the boy has taken a turn to putting quill to paper."
A new recruit always does lift his spirits so. "So he's told me." I slide my hand to the back of Elete's head, feeling along the base of his skull. "Quite some headache you've got, it seems."
"They come and go." He brushes it off, which makes it easier for me to prod deeper. 'Sy and Katherine are better at searching him, but that's largely because I'm not often willing to pry directly myself. He's pushed my patience and then some, though. This illness has lingered for how long now? We can't even tell - it's been obvious in the past few months to his close students, but he's likely been hiding it for much longer, or explaining it away as 'his usual ailments'. Of course, none of that is even on his mind right now. "Tell me, do you think his Father will mind if I..." he trails off, unable to find a complimentary way to say it.
"If you go about meddling in his affairs like you always have a mind to?" I chuckle. I delve a little deeper into him. He's so difficult to scrutinize. So damn guarded, ever since he moved here from Lyiannethe so many years ago. "...Be careful. 'Sy's only just got his son back, and that son has gone through quite the ordeal." I pause in my scrutiny to think about it for a moment. "It would be better if you waited for Tesynnodai to approach you about Lyric himself. He will. His first concern will be giving Lyric something constructive to do and putting him somewhere safe."
Elete chuckles. "Really? The Jhe h'Akribastes describing a training at the Poet Hall as either constructive or safe would certainly be a moment worth recording."
It's hard to search any deeper than I am, and I can't just do this with a surface reading. I don't know what's causing these episodes of his, but this is the worst yet that I've seen. He should be unconscious. He's straining himself just by staying awake. "Well then, wait for it so that you can put it to permanent record yourself, because I'm sure it will happen." Damn it. I just can't see it. I don't know what to look for or where to look. Elete's always made it a point to keep me from knowing what it is that might distress him.
"Unkie? I have the tea. Lyric made your coffee." I hear a clink as Stevane sets the tray down and then serves her King his tea. He tries to sit up. It's funny how both Stevane and I hold him down at once.
Stevane imparts him with one of her cheerful smiles. "Jhe h'Lete? Why don't you just prop yourself up on your side? I've noticed a tea's flavor improves when enjoyed in a relaxed posture."
Damn, she really can pretend for him, can't she? At least he accepts the excuse gracefully and does as requested. He looks less strained when there's a cup of tea in his hands.
Lyric gives me a nudge. It certainly is a dire situation when I have to be reminded that I have coffee. Stevane can see to her King for the moment. I give Lyric a nod and then take my cup, sink into a nearby armchair, and dose myself.
Gerald looks up from the chair across from me, then immediately looks away from me. He must have been doing his very best to make us forget he was here, because I certainly did.
Well, he certainly isn't the only one in the room who's obviously trying to hide something. "Do you want to talk about it?" He mulls that over. "Get some coffee, then, and think it over. I'm tired of the whole world clamming up around me. You'd think I was your Dad."
Gerald snorts as he gets up. "Thanks, sir."
I scoff. "Disowning me as your Uncle now? It seems I lose more family to protocol every day."
"Sorry, Uncle." He makes himself a cup, then settles back in, shoulders so tight that I wonder if he can even reach his arms over his head. "Bad day."
"Considering the amount of people still alive to see the rest of it, I'd judge it a fair one so far. Come, now. What's eating you?" I watch him take an awkward gulp of coffee, then fidget in his chair. He looks over to where his brother and sister are attending the Poet King. Elete's already chatting the boy up, of course, but I suppose it provides an excellent distraction for the three of them. Everyone's as wound up as a cat on a leaky raft.
"...Most things are eating me." Gerald closes his eyes and sips, then lets out a long, low sigh. "How have Father and Katherine been?"
I snort. Fine. The boy decides to pick at my sore spots. "My brother and my daughter are just darling together." I hold back an acrid comment about weddings. I don't want to even think about those two marrying.
Gerald experiences a sober moment. "...I'm sorry, sir, I hadn't even thought about it that way."
I snort. No one ever thinks about me. "No, really, what's eating you?"
He experiences another one of those strange moments of clarity. I wonder what I'm saying that's so illuminating to him? "I guess...something that's not as big as I think it is. Look, am I going to be useful around here, or should I just haul off?"
I grin. "You know Gerald, you've got a good head on your shoulders for a son of Tesynnodai. Why don't you go out and get a gauge of how your Father is doing with the Jhe o'Audiva Rocale?" I catch the look he gives me, his head cocked to the side. "I don't look in on certain things my brother does, Gerald. I find it a much better idea those times to give him my trust without my scrutiny. It would be best if you waited for them to come out, and then fetched them."
He gets up without a reply and bows courteously before he leaves. I wonder a little bit about him, but I don't think he has problems I can solve that his Father wouldn't solve in a better way.
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Gerald
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...Okay, I think I've been kind of a dick. I guess it took my Uncle coming straight off of a caffeine hit to make me realize it. When I look at the Kathe thing from his perspective, though...wow. But now I've got my boots on the right feet, as it were, and I'm using them to march right down to the Peacock King's holding cell. I know Katherine and 'Sy will have to end up here after Ebrellin-i's secondary interrogation.
Heck, the fact that he got one was pretty extraordinary. I mean, Lyric got sentenced and almost executed and everything without getting some special process called up for him. I don't really know what his Trial was all about.
'Ye'd know if you'd calm down and ask us instead of wandering around and whimpering at everyone like a lost pup.'
...Okay. I am a little chagrined by that. 'Fine. Why didn't you two tell me about his Trial?'
'Because it wouldn't have changed nuthin'.'
'A Trial's a Trial. Ye've got to conduct yerself the same way no matter whose neck it is.'
'Ye know that sure as ye know anything. Why're we even tellin' ya this?'
...I hate getting my ass handed to me by my own guns. There's nothing more wounding to my dignity.
'Eh? How about that time Katherine shoved Gevurah's revolver barrel into your mouth and told you to suck it like a cheap whore if you didn't like her trail cooking?'
...Make that the second most wounding thing.
I gather my wits back together. A proper dressing-down helps with that sometimes. 'So my brother gets tried and pardoned for a single crime against an animism, and the man who forced him to do so much of that gets a special hearing before he'll even get sentenced? I know Ebrellin-i was crazy, but...' I shake my head.
'Ye think he's not crazy enough not to die for his actions like your brother could have if Faun hadn't requested he be pardoned?'
'Why are ye so eager for the turkey buzzard to die? Not that we blame ye.'
'A vile creature he be, but can ye say that he deserves his death with no complete testimony of his actions?'
'Don't you know what it means when Katherine takes special testimony from someone?'
I shake my head. 'I thought it was only done for exceptions from the Law, even when Father claims there are no exceptions from the Law.'
'Nay. Lyric could give his own testimony without special assistance. Even if he'd held back from admitting things, Diyn would drag it out of him in your Father's Court sure enough.'
'The Advocate tries those who have lost the ability to give their own testimony.'
'He's a right crazy buzzard, that King. He was tryin' to kill 'imself before he'd plead insanity.'
'That in itself is reason enough for him to have a special hearing. Whatever he's hiding is important enough for him to destroy himself before giving it up.'
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Katherine
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It's easy to focus on how limp his arms are, hanging down in the same way that his hair drags behind him. His closed eyes and weary expression both could give me a false sense of security.
'Sy doesn't allow that, crossing Diyn in front of Ebrellin-i's chest before the regent can step any further. "Reveal yourself," he whispers. My Father's eyes open.
He had possibly been unconscious once or twice after his Trial, but it's doubtful. No, whatever is within him was still pretending - trying to exploit any weakness that it could find. That won't stop, of course. He'll never stop trying to get himself killed.
That's why we have to destroy that part of him, if you can even call it a part of him. Or at least, I hope we can destroy it. I hope it's not a true part of his Will. If it is...it's back to the Court for him, and 'Sy really will Judge him. We were spared from Lyric's execution. I pray we'll be spared from my Father's as well.
He looks down at me. He doesn't recognize me. I can see that in his eyes. I've not changed enough for that to be possible. He should know his daughter. He knew me last night. But still, he tries to smile, tries to pretend, to look endearing.
It's time.
They never scream when this part comes, and I don't know why, because I want to scream. 'Sy tells me that they forget their wretched mouths at this moment, or even worse, become too cowardly to speak unless commanded.
"Ebrellin-i. You are well-acquainted with cowardice, are you not?" He nods. He tries to shake his head, then, realizing that he had answered me. He fails at even moving his head.
Within this room, there can be nothing but Truth spoken.
"When did you start hurting your daughters?" I don't wince at the question. 'Sy winces for me, but Ebrellin-i does not see him.
"I, I didn--" He halts his speech. A bead of sweat breaks out on his forehead. He's fighting it, but he'll lose. They all do, in the end. This is a Grace to bestow on them, but it hurts me so much. And if they didn't fight it so hard, they wouldn't need to be here in the first place. "Rocsui-ehellenae. I renamed her when she was three. Closer to four. I wanted to protect her, so I removed her name and bound her to me with a new one. I don't remember when the feath--no. Now I do. She was eleven. I feared the day she would grow old enough to begin attracting a mate, who would then take her from my protection. I brought her to my lab and asked her if she wanted to be more beautiful than any other woman would ever be. I needed some indication of consent to enable the process. I made her into someone singular. Unmateable. It meant tainting the Xaillyndesse blood, of course, but I no longer cared for the particulars of that lineage. Eleth-travente could carry on the line if he so wished. I had better things to do. Katherine, though. She was difficult. I couldn't have her, no matter how much I fought the contract or tried to sabotage custodial negotiations. All I could manage, in the end, was to trouble my ex-suitor and ensure she wasn't raised by either of her Fathers. There was very little I could do there, unfortunately. She was always so well-guarded. But in a way, that fulfilled my intentions and my obligations. She was very rarely near me. She was safe. Not safe enough, but I could only do so much."
I narrow my eyes. "And what are you keeping them safe from?"
Ebrellin-i's face is so calm, now. As if he were giving a lecture in his labs. He's starting to accept this, find shelter in it. Or perhaps he's convinced that if he says the right thing, it will get him destroyed, and end his master's worries. "Myself, of course. I could not trust myself with children. Oh, I tried to convince myself it was untrue. Even got Hesperides with two darlings when she begged it of me. That protected her from me, though, so it was acceptable. Keeping children away was better. They might find out. They might see me. They might know what I was. And worse...what owns me might see them and want them, and I couldn't have that. It isn't my children's fault that I'm a traitor."
I nod. "Fine, then. Tell the rest of the truth. You've only given me half."
His face is calm. "I'm sorry, my dear, but I haven't the faintest what you're--" He frowns, his tongue stopping itself. He shakes his head, tries to fight me again. "But I don't...stop showing me this."
"You must look."
"I have no need to see these things." He jerks against the chains. 'Sy presses the Trident's staff closer against Ebrellin-i's chest.
"Every creature must gain a clear sight of who and what he is. You are no exception. This is a favor to you."
"I don't WANT--" he chokes on his own words. Even that was a lie. "Please. Just let me go in peace."
"What can he do to you, all the way from Nul, if you disobey him here?" Ebrellin-i's panicked expression surprises both the Judge and I. If nothing else, his terror is genuine. "Tell me how he punishes you."
"No." His voice is dead quiet, his skin as pale as the white makeup he wears. Still, my power compels him to speak. His mouth opens no matter how his own crippled free will fights to keep it closed. "You can't make--please don't make me. I don't--please. Please." Tears trail down his face, his shoulders jerking. I can see the cracks running along his mind. I draw Gedulah. A shining length of steel, ivory and gold. "Please..."
I ready it. 'Sy moves the Trident away. I thrust my sword through Ebrellin-i's heart.
I feel its beat like a pulse against my palm, throbbing through Gedulah's hilt. Now Ebrellin-i screams.
It's not the wound, you see. It's his heart. He's buried it for so long, trying to forget its existence. Trying to rationalize those beats away as just blood and biomechanics, no matter how damn much he knows about chakras and energy flow. Putting the pain away meant not having to be hurt by his own actions. No, more than that. He'd done much more than that to himself.
Or rather, much more than that had been done to him by someone else. I try to feel for it, but it's too raw to parse through my blade. It's strange to see a person who has been this damaged and mixed up, but was walking around and pretending so convincingly that he was whole. What's wrong with him?
I'm thinking too much. He has to see it for himself. He has to see the knots for them to be untangled. I concentrate on bringing the feelings in his heart forward again. He chokes on his agony. I strain harder until 'Sy's hand falls on my shoulder.
"Don't break him, Khatarina." I frown.
Ebrellin-i is breaking from this, and that's not supposed to happen.
I stop drawing it out, and focus again on interrogation. "Tell me how he punishes you, Ebrellin-i."
Ebrellin-i screams, but it can't mask out the words. "Like this! LIKE THIS!"
I almost drop the blade. I cut short the franticness in the back of my mind that wants to chase itself in circles, scrambling over how Nul could control me and make me into a kind of torture. I keep my grip steady. "Explain."
"He makes me watch!" Ebrellin-i tries to writhe away from the blade, tries to escape, but the chains keep him steady for me. "He makes me watch when I'm like this! I tried to seal them away! I tried to keep my heart silent! He'd have nothing to use then! I could be free!" He's so self-convinced of those lies that they've become their own truths. Very well. Let him speak rather than be silent. "I didn't want to. I didn't want to!"
"You didn't want to what?" 'Sy asks it for me.
"Become this! Writhe for him! Be his p-p-p-pet!" He jerks, his posture straightening with panic. "He'll punish me now. He'll punish me now. He'll punish me now for speaking. I try to be so quiet. I can never stop talking or whimpering, as much as I try. He scares me so much. He'll punish me now. I tried to learn. I'm trying so hard to be good."
'Sy's arm supports me as the panic washes back into me. It wells up so much that I can't block it without help. Even while wielding Gedulah. This terror...it's not natural.
Ebrellin-i's punishment. This fear. It's blinding.
I have to cleanse him of it.
"You'll cripple him."
"Better than letting him live blind." I close my eyes and send the fear back into Ebrellin-i. It causes him to howl again, but I need to be calm. I need perfect clarity. I open my eyes.
I see a man. His name is Ebrellin-i. He ruled an Empire. He is my Father. He is hurting.
I'm going to have to dive into him with Gedulah. "'Sy. Wait for me."
There's just enough time for me to hear my partner curse before my senses are overtaken with what is inside Ebrellin-i's heart.
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