* * *
Rhia
* * *
"The Emperor is out of his fucking mind. Long live the Emperor!"
Luci raises his glass at his own toast. 'Sy follows suit a bit more clumsily, then drains it in one large swallow. I try not to laugh too hard. From what little Luci told us of what happened with Theos, he's more than earned his inebriation, and of course 'Sy is there to support him in whatever he does. Luckily, they're sitting on the floor, stacks of barrels providing the support they both really need at the moment. They clank their glasses together once more, and Luci fumbles around for the bottle they're sharing. I watch as he turns it over, then shakes it. He pouts at the bottle, then turns the pout on 'Sy. "It's empty!"
'Sy reaches behind his back and produces a new bottle. "Problem solved."
I trade glances with Val. He shrugs and sips from his glass. I look down at mine and take another tentative sip. It's good, whatever it is, but it's not wine.
"Made from sugar," Val says, looking down at his own glass. "I've heard of it, but I've never had this before." He holds it up, watching the caramel-colored liquid swirl. In contrast to my brothers, he looks sharper as he drinks. His eyes have an alertness to them, a contrast to the usual calm passiveness they usually hold. Like he's awake. He smiles down at 'Sy and Luci, the soft glow of our tiny fire sending shadows flickering across his skin.
Handsome.
I hide my expression behind a nice long swallow. Where had that come from? ...Where did any of it come from? I shudder from the drink, wincing involuntarily. I don't know when this noticing started happening, but I'm not comfortable with it. Archo don't need that way, not like others.
It started when I lost the Veil. I blink, looking into my cup, then up at Val. His voice had been so quiet that I didn't recognize it as his for a moment. I check my shields, but he must have been picking up on some emotion, not my bare thoughts. He's perceptive, even tucked away in his own head.
You too?
Val nods, leaning back against the stacked caskets. I think we're all feeling something like it, to some degree. It makes sense that it's stronger in you. You went into the Void before this began.
I reach up, my fingers grazing the outside corner of my eye. Lots of things changed with our eyes. What else was in store for us? That much makes sense. What do you think this is?
I think--
"We need our own place. A place like this. Val, what is this place, anyway? It's wonderful!" Luci throws his arms wide, as if to hug the dark room we're hiding in. 'Sy blinks owlishly at us over Luci's shoulder and nods.
Val chokes. "You don't know? I was following your directions!"
Luci's eyes widen. "I was half-dead of exhaustion! How could I have given you directions to a place I've never been?"
"I've never been here either! You pictured it so clearly that I simply went!" Val closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Remind me not to go with your impulse decisions again."
"Pfft." Luci waves a hand absently in his direction. "My impulse decisions are almost as good as my planned ones. No matter. We're here, I've discovered something wonderful, and best of all, we're not dead."
We share a moment of silence for that simple, wonderful fact. In that moment of quiet, I have a dim flash of memory of the Void, a simple impression of quiet and peace. I suppose being dead wasn't all bad, but no, I'm in no rush to return.
'Sy breaks the silence with a low, musical hum that strengthens into the melody of a familiar shanty. Luci chuckles, then joins in, his pleasant tenor filling the room. Their voices dance through the lyrics, setting my foot tapping.
I think we simply miss the closeness we had. Val's quiet thought catches me off-guard, interrupting the rhythm my feet were keeping. Luci and 'Sy don't seem to notice. Their arms are over each other's shoulders, glasses raised high as they sing about the glories of battle. It looks odd, but then, that casual contact underscores Val's point. Archo... we don't touch, not really. Not without cause. Val nods. You and Arik, and to a degree Theosil, were pretty notable in that common-style familiarity. Nobody understood it.
I shrug. We never thought about it. That's just the way we were. But now... I sip my drink, my gaze still on 'Sy and Luci. It's different, Val. This isn't just simple familiarity. I feel... Sinking. Cold, dark, winds and bare fields of ruin.
Alone? Fingers trail along my bare arm, chills racing in their wake. I nod and sigh, leaning into the nascent touch.
No matter how close we get, I still feel alone.
Val wraps an arm around my shoulder, and I lean into the sideways hug. I think we are alone, now. In a way.
We watch 'Sy and Luci collapse into a fit of giggles as they finish the song, refilling each other's glasses and clinking them together. They launch into another song, a joyous celebration of exploration and conquest. 'Sy forgets the lyrics halfway through the first verse, his stumbling tripping up Luci as well. I burst into giggles as they glare at each other, then continue singing, fumbling over the lyrics even more and eyeing each other with their arms still slung over each other's shoulders. Val shakes slightly in silent laughter, and for some reason, the simple motion of him next to me comforts that weird ache in my chest. It uncurls, relaxing, and escapes me in a small sigh. Val's hand tightens on my shoulder, and he nudges politely against the edges of my mind in question.
Knowing helps, I explain, letting my mind relax and open towards Val's as well. If I had been feeling that awful, how much worse had it been for him, who had to willingly cut himself off from us in a way he had always been connected?
His mind leans into mine ever-so-slightly, like a hand folding over another's. Thank you, Rhia, he says, the quiet relief in his mind speaking volumes about just how alone he had been in his own head. I swallow, choking back guilty sadness. Not your fault. We're all relearning who we are, and that was just my particular lesson.
Where is mine, then? I regret even thinking that a split second before he answers.
You already have some idea. Thankfully, he doesn't go digging for it. I'm surprised to realize that I don't think he would, now. It's not who he is anymore. His days of being Theos's Voice and, in a lot of ways, the Archo Babysitter are done. I watch 'Sy and Luci wrap up their song, laughing and drinking companionably. They aren't who they were, either. I alone of the four of us am left with my name, but I'm not always the Advocate now, am I?
Who am I outside of that?
'Sy lurches to his feet, bringing the bottle with him. He walks up to me, smiling, then suddenly leans over and kisses my cheek. "Your glass is empty. Quit staring around like the world is ending and come drink with us like it is."
Val laughes, giving me a tiny push. "I'll grab a few more bottles while one of us can still stand, hmm?" I walk over and drop to the ground next to Luci, who tries to hug me, but ends up just squeezing my head instead. I make the mistake of struggling, and his arm slips around my throat. Val looks over, alarmed at my squeak, and 'Sy gently prys Luci's arm from it's stranglehold. "I love you guys," he says, his blue eyes shining. "I love you best," he says in Val's general direction with feeling, as Val sits down between me and 'Sy. Several bottles gently roll from his arms onto the floor.
'Sy salutes Val with a wide grin. "Remind me to properly thank you for finding this place."
Luci squawks. "I found it! Val just brought us."
'Sy thrusts a bottle into his hands, prompting a happy coo from my barely coherent brother. He then pours for the rest of us with another, then lifts his glass.
"May we find our way home once more!"
We raise our glasses to join his, Luci's taking a more meandering path than the rest, and drink.
* * *
Characters:
