* * *
Rahellene
* * *
Daddy's said something that, for the first time since I can remember, I didn't like hearing. My response is, well, less than mature.
I stamp my foot. "I don't want to."
He doesn't look surprised, which I would expect. I was surprised by that little outburst. Instead, his expression shifts into what I would suspect was a smile if this were a different situation. He clasps his hands behind him, leans back a little, and lets his shoulders relax. His eyes close, and he exhales, somehow at peace.
His eyes open, and he stands up straight again, composing himself. He puts his hand on my shoulder. He looks straight into my eyes.
"Rahellene, I want to visit him even less than you do, but I have to do what I have to do for my Empire. You also feel compelled to do what you have to do for your own homeland. If that is what you want, then you need to give your regards to your Father before you leave. That is part of your duty." He leans back, letting out another, less peaceful sigh. "And besides, if you don't do it, then I'll have to deal with him when he finds out that you left without saying anything to him. I can be there when you talk to him, if you want. I would like that much better than having to talk to him alone after you leave."
I bite my lip. Daddy works so hard, and he's done everything I've ever asked, and I'd really like to just ask him to deal with Father anyway. I wonder for a moment if I could convince him to do that, however much he'd not like that. He likes me a lot. He likes to make me happy. He never tells me no when I ask him for something, either! Maybe he just needs to reconsider.
And well... who can really tell me no, if I really want something? Jax never told me no, because he knew what was good for him. Daddy thinks he knows Father, but he hasn't lived with him for years like I did. He doesn't know what it's like to be under Father's control, to try to face him and find all your words stolen before they even reach your tongue. To be petted on the head like I'm just another pretty bird, and then suddenly there's no thought in me, no motivation, just a contentment and lack of worry that isn't really mine but won't go away.
"You... you just don't know." I bite my lip. I suppose it could look like I'm trying to be pitiful, but really I'm just nervous.
He doesn't even argue - just tilts his head with a smile that's too sad to be on his face. "I do, but perhaps we don't need to talk about that right now." He looks... tense. I thought he'd tell me I was wrong and order me to go do it anyway, not look afraid.
What's Father done, that we're both like this? "Maybe we do."
He shakes his head. "No. You're not ready. I'm not ready. But we're both high-strung enough from that to help us get through a little family talk, aren't we? Sometimes you can play your weaknesses as if they're strengths."
* * *
Ebrelle
* * *
"Okay, now get out of bed already. You slept just fine." Stevane crosses her arms and glares at me. "And if you keep sitting around all day you're going to get fat."
I raise an eyebrow, every bit of my regal bearing drawing me up. "Xaillyndessen don't get fat, my dear."
She snorts. "That's because you're the first one of them to discover donuts."
I frown. I don't see what's wrong with that. Donuts are so delicious, after all, flaky and light with any number of flavors and little sprinkles on them. I like the sprinkles the most.
I allow myself to be shooed out of bed without much of any fuss. It seems silly to put up a fight when I don't feel like being in bed at all. I want to get up and do things and apply this energy that I've managed to scrape up from seemingly nowhere. Is that what sleep is supposed to do for me? It's been something to endure in the months since my recuperation began, and before then it was just a chance for my mind to be pulled into Nul for orders and more conditioning.
I realize I'm just standing here doing nothing. I should get out of my nightrobe and into something appropriate for...
"Stevane? What is it that I do, anyway?" I catch the girl in the middle of picking through the tea tins. She pauses in her fiddling, face perplexed, and looks up as if I'm crazy.
"Whine to me? Drink all the mint without telling me to replace it? Tell stuff to Jhe h'Leste that you don't think I'll understand because you don't think I know Aurocan?"
Wait, she knows Aurocan?
"Forget to braid your hair before you sleep and then complain that it's all tangled in the morning?"
I wave my hand. "No, I mean beside all that."
She shrugs. "Other than that you do a lot of nothing."
I frown. "Well then, what am I to wear?"
"To do nothing? I guess you wear noth-- I mean, um..." A knock at the door saves us both from an awkward moment. She sighs with relief. "Excuse me. I'll see to it."
Strange. I wasn't expecting Alestere to come back so soon. I watch her pad to the door, only now realizing that she's still in pajamas and combat boots. I'm not even really sure when she dressed in those, come to think. What did I miss last night?
"Oh!" Stevane sounds surprised.
I try to poke at who could be out there but the room's well-warded both inside and out. Alestere told me that if he left the Hall open for me to probe with my mind, I'd never climb out of my own head... and cited security concerns for some reason.
"He's not dressed yet. It's been an odd morning. Would you like to come back in fifteen minutes? Oh, good. Thank you!" She closes the door, then turns to me.
I raise both eyebrows. "Alestere needs me to dress up for audiences with him now?"
"No, you silly. Get into something presentable, your daughter Rahellene is here to visit you. And so is Unkie, so I'll need to go get the coffee. I'll help you with your hair when I'm back." She catches my eyes, looking a little deeper than I expected. "Alright?"
I realize that's not an opening for me to say 'no'.
* * *
Stevane
* * *
It would figure: after all the years of me haranguing Jhe h'Logos about it, all the struggles, the pain, the fights, the tears, and the pouts... the one time I really need to ask him for help, he's actually asleep when he should be. I can't get mad at him about it, either. He's being responsible! I'm actually kind of proud.
But I also sense a situation that could easily boil into something not-so-good. I don't talk to Jhe 'Brelle too much about Unkie or vice versa, but I've picked up enough from Jhe 'Brelle's dreams and Jhe h'Leste's careful suggestions to know where there's bad blood. Jhe h'Leste would know how to manage things to keep them calm. He has a way with people - I've noticed so far that he has a better knack than even Jhe h'Lete did. But he's not here right now. I am.
Well, coffee will make it better. That's a start, so I'm off to get some. Jhe 'Brelle seems a bit shaken up by the possibility of a talk, but he can dress himself alone. And just in case even that manages to overcome his delicate sensibilities, I left Millie behind with him.
It doesn't take me too long to get the coffee together, but I decide to wait just a little bit longer to let Jhe 'Brelle compose himself. Usually I have to guess at this stuff, but we're more solidly connected now - which means I can tell that he's a bit slow about getting his clothes in order. He is, at least, moving along and making a real attempt at looking presentable. He's just a little shaken up. More shaken up than I expected--
--really don't want to see him right now, wish I never had to again--
--but I suppose whatever happened between them once wasn't pretty.
They have to get along at some level, though. They've got two kids, and that's not something you can do on accident when you're both male. I'm not even sure how they do it. I mean, I've never really had to worry about it myself - I've just had to focus on not getting pregnant when I... you know. Between anyone Archo-bred being able to decide when they have a child, and the Regeneration Chamber and all its mystical powers, and the kinds of magic you can find or buy or barter for if you try hard enough or have the right amount of riches, there's all sorts of interesting ways that you can have or not have a child in Crux Radia. Then there's all the weird things Thelea Xaillyndesse has done to make children, and Jhe 'Brelle's old laboratory work...
Make a list of the weirdest ways you could think of to end up with a baby, pick one at random, and that's probably how Jhe Katherine happened. If you've ever met her, no potential origin story should surprise you. I didn't even know Jhe 'Brelle was her other Father until I ended up having to babysit him. As for Jhe Rahellene, I don't even know. I just know Unkie dotes on her like she's still a baby. Not that he doesn't spoil all the rest of his kids, plus his nieces and nephews.
Yeah, Unkie's the type to spoil a kid. Jhe 'Brelle's the type to keep them on a nice comfy and safe trinket shelf, then feel terrible about it when they don't like him for it afterward. Which, I suppose, is its own way of spoiling.
Well, the coffee has been done for awhile, and if I wait any longer it'll start to get cold. Jhe 'Brelle seems to be as presentable as he can get himself. Time to help him arrange his hair and then host an audience between him, Unkie, and their younger daughter.
Thrilling.
* * *
Jhe 'Brelle insists that I rearrange his hairpins one more time. I sigh, tuck a few between my lips to hold them while I arrange his endless hair, then weave the mass of it through the slender pins one last time.
"Is the clump showing?" His voice is plaintive. He's fretted over this for several minutes. Gerald told me the story about Lyric cutting the bit of Jhe 'Brelle's hair - it seems to have been farther towards the outer layers than my brother had intended. Sometimes the shorter strands stick out a bit.
"I've hidden it just fine. You know, you could just cut the whole mass of it to the length of that little short bit, then--" His glare cuts me off. It's not the first time I've made that jab, and not the first time he's given me that glare in reply. I pat his head, keeping in mind that I'm probably the only person who could do so in response to that look and still live. "Your hair is beautiful. No one can see the tuft."
He exhales through his fine Xaillyndesse nose. The little hump in it only shows a tad. When Daddy breaks something, he means it.
"Do you want to change your earrings?" I hold up a few other pairs. His current ones are a little less gaudy than what he's known for, but then, his tastes have turned a bit from then.
"No. These are fine." He still angles his head to see the tiny silver filigrees dangle and sway from his lobes.
"Would you like to try some makeup? It would just be a minute or two."
He scowls. "Considering my years on the throne, my face has been painted enough to last my entire lifetime."
I smile just a bit. "Well then, you're done. Take a seat and I'll conduct the guests to theirs."
He doesn't really have a retort to that - in fact, he's surprised I led him into it so easily. He sits at the table in the main room. Millie curls at his feet. I draw the curtains around his bed and wonder if he couldn't do with a larger space now. This has been fine for recuperation, but isn't he gaining his feet?
I look at him sitting there, back straight, hands folded in his lap, trying so hard to project invulnerability, and I wonder.
Well, everything's set, then. He looks suitably formal (but not to the level of a parade float), and the coffee and tea are set up, and we're ready for our guests. I hope the room doesn't explode or anything. I open the door and make my best diplomatic bow (which is pretty good, if I must say so myself - Jhe h'Lete said that I'd have passed my Diplomacy classes much faster if I never had to actually open my mouth in them).
Unkie has a strange smile on his face, as if he's holding in a laugh. I'm not really sure why, but I wave him in anyway. Jhe Rahellene raises her eyebrows at me. Have I done something offensive? That really is my very best bow. Well, nothing to be done for it - I close the door behind them both, lead them to their seats, and begin to serve the tea and coffee.
* * *
Luciprochoros
* * *
It is at least somewhat of a relief that Stevane's here for this meeting - it means that someone's here that could possibly in some way keep Ebrelle in check, or possibly make him keep himself in check. I can never tell with him - he's always been so precise, so measured about his attacks, that they almost always appear planned. He always did take such pains to present a front that showed no flaws nor errors. So much window dressing, so many props, so many dances and rehearsed acts.
I suppose that's why looking at him now throws me off so much - he's dressed well for the occasion, his hair is done, he's more than presentable... but it's not as over-starched and obsessively pinned and immaculate as his act used to be. I've seen him in all manner of dress and undress, and I've certainly caught him without his all his feathers in place, but those weren't the times he was before his own Court. Perhaps it's the white hair that's throwing him in such sharp contrast to the Ebrellin-i I knew - he's so pale that without the dark mane surrounding him, he's almost ghostly. It's so strange to see his face without any makeup on it, either. It looks so naked, out here in the open. He doesn't have his mask.
And I admit I might be making this up, but he almost looks afraid.
Stevane finishes with the coffee and tea. We each take a courtesy sip or two before talking. I assume I'll mostly be speaking for Rahellene, since she was so anxious to have this meeting. Considering the custodial implications and the diplomatic sensitivity, it's a little strange to have Stevane here for this, but since she's been with Ebrelle for the last few months she's probably up to speed on a number of issues. She doesn't let him boss her around, either. So it really does level the playing field. I open my mouth to begin the meeting.
"Father, I'm going to Audiva Rocale within the week." Rahellene sits up in her chair, straight and prim, her posture that of someone in control and confident they'll succeed.
I'm so proud that I forget for a moment that my mouth is still open. Nobody notices because Ebrelle is staring at Rahellene like she just announced she was pregnant with quintuplets, and Stevane's looking at Ebrelle with a pinched expression of trying-not-to-show-worry. I close my mouth. Ebrelle opens his. I brace for impact.
"Are you sure that's safe?" Odd, that's not the loud, commanding protest I expected from him. There's nothing devious about it, either. He looks genuinely worried. Then again, he always was the type to shelter a child, like 'Sy tried to be sometimes and mostly failed at or gave up on.
Rahellene looks over to me. Ah, my turn. "I've been in communication with our own defense and guards as well as the ones in place at your Palace. I've the assurance of the new Kommissar that her safety will be ensured. Considering he's looked after the safety of our soldiers instead of killing them left and right as his predecessor did, I'm inclined to trust him. He's shown concern for you, even made some noise about hoping you'd return sooner than projected." Odd, he got a little pale there. I'll have to ask Stevane if he's been ill lately. "He certainly has an affinity for the Aurocan royal family, other than the Queen Mother, and it's the last point that endears him the most to me, I'll admit."
Ebrelle makes a smirk that looks half-ill, but I suppose the subject of Thelea Xaillyndesse puts everyone off their last meal. He sips at his tea, and then Millie flops aggressively onto his ankle and purrs louder. When he looks up, he's remarkably more composed. "Jhe Calyx Gorey must be the one you speak of. I kept him at a distance as much as I did the Kommissar, as he was his right hand man at the time. My knowledge of him is not as extensive as it could be. I've no complaints of him, though - he seemed focused on his job and on the Empire more than his own petty power grabs. Otherwise I always suspected Xen would be long dead by now." He blinks, then hazards a glance at Stevane.
She hums to herself, not looking any of us in the eye.
"Well, no sense digging up the dead--"
"Except for a few more stabs," mutters Stevane.
"--when the living are the matter at hand." Ebrelle regards his daughter. "It's not going to be as it once was, my daughter. Your gardens are no longer kept, and the wards will not function at all the same. I cannot ensure your protection there yet myself, and I've yet to recover enough to... consider the journey there yet."
I frown. What's he getting around? There's something he's hiding.
"Perhaps you'd like to wait? It would terrify me to know you weren't properly attended, dear daughter." Ah, that old composure again, that sneaky tongue. I recognize this Ebrelle now. It almost relaxes me to see him playing the same old games.
"I can see to my own safety, little as you taught me to," Rahellene says with more disdain than I care to hear, but less than I think Ebrelle deserves for his treatment of her prior to now. "I'm just as capable as you are of managing for myself. More, in fact."
Ebrelle raises an eyebrow. I'm expecting him to rise up and argue, but instead he looks... weary. My, his recovery has been slow... or perhaps Rahellene's was far too fast for him to bear. He looks to me instead of her. "I suppose you've attempted reason with her already?"
I snort. "Reason? She wants something perfectly justifiable, Ebrelle. Her home. I've already promised her protection. We only want a promise from you."
Something lurks back in his eyes - suspicion, with the expectation of future treachery. "Go on?"
I take a deep breath, then brace myself. It really hasn't been so bad so far. He's barely fought us. Maybe we'll get through this intact. "She wants your promise that you won't cage her ever again, and you will allow her to live her life freely, in the spirit the Law provides her. You won't be able to do anything now, but we know one day soon you'll be in Audiva Rocale again, on your throne. It's not going to be the same this time, Ebrelle - we want your promise of that, and we'll report said oath to the Judge if need be."
He looks away. For a moment, he looked like a trapped animal, and I felt sick looking at him. Only for that moment, though. His fingers curl, hands clenching in his lap, as if grasping for purchase. When he does speak, his voice is dry. "The Law is the Law. I can't change that. Go, and be safe."
Rahellene stares at him for ten full seconds, unable to reply. I don't think she believes her ears. I might not believe mine. Stevane only looks concerned for Ebrelle, frowning slightly.
"Well." I nod to Ebrelle. "I thank you, as her other Father."
"Thank you, Father. Both of you." Rahellene rises, then curtsies. "There is no other business, so I shall go and gather my things."
Ebrelle just bites his lip. I feel strange, looking at him. I decide to rise as well, the feeling making me uncomfortable. "Thank you for your time. She will write, of course, and I'll have constant correspondence from our combined security forces regarding her safety and well-being. Don't hesitate to ask for them."
Ebrelle nods in reply, unable to meet my eyes. "Thank you."
I give Stevane a nod, and I feel the tiniest push from her, as if she wishes me to leave. Time for her to do damage control, perhaps. I'm not averse to fulfilling her request.
I realized what it is I felt when looking at Ebrelle. Pity. I don't know if I ever felt it for him before, truly felt it, even when I watched him lie broken and all but possessed in our own jail cell. Now I look at him and it just about breaks my heart.
I leave and hurry to my office, trying to put the pity out of my mind. I've too much work to do, and too little time to worry over Ebrelle's feelings. He got himself into this mess, after all.
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